Am I a bridge person? If you have come this far asking yourself that question, you are in the right place. Although we heard this concept for the first time on the podcast “The posh and the Quinqui”in its first episode, I have to admit that I have been a bridge girl and you may wonder if you have been too.
The concept is related to relationships and the people who help us move from one relationship to another. Perhaps with this you intuit what we mean, but we are going to go into detail to explain it to you better.
What are bridge people
Bridge girls, bridge people in this case, are those who repair what another has broken so that a third person ends up committed to that person that you have fixed. A person leaves a relationship and after a while he runs into another person and decides to give it a try. But when it comes to breakups, the accumulated shit is always bigger than we imagine and the bridge person will be in charge of cleaning it up. Let me explain: a bridge girl is one who starts dating a guy who has suffered a breakup, fixes the little pieces of his broken heart and walks out the door as he walked in, without commitment.
Perhaps you have used one relationship to forget another. Friend, you are the nail that has pulled another nail, despite the fact that we have always said that this is not the solution for get over a breakup.
The concept of a bridge person has another, much more beautiful connotation, at least for those who come across them. They are those that help you move from one place to another. and with which you go from one experience to another, contributing things along the way. Whether it’s teachings or simple good times that help us.
Sometimes a bridge person is a co-worker who lends you a hand at a difficult time in your life without asking for anything in return and then disappears. Other times that kind soul stays and helps us navigate a muddy path of life, helping us and giving us support.
I have been a bridge person and I have had bridge people with this second connotation, but the truth is that it is not always as beautiful as it seems. And yes, I have also been a bridge girl with couples that I have helped and when they no longer needed me, I have lost sight.
How to know if I am a bridge person in a relationship
if it makes you pocketingif he avoids talking about his ex and it is always a taboo subject, if you only meet to fuck (but you don’t know that you are friends with benefits because you never talk about it), if he doesn’t make plans with you in the medium term or if you have met a friend of his by chance and he has introduced you as a friend, you are a bridge girl.
The relationship is conditioned by the process of change that one of the members of the couple is undergoing, and although the commitment of the bridge person is full, for the other person it is not and that ends up leading to a break.
The bridge girls arrive, fix what’s broken and leave, healing that wound and preparing the person for their next relationship. And in that new relationship you will not be afraid of commitment. You have fixed what was broken and now that you don’t suffer, enjoy the relationship you wanted, but it does without you. That person I was not ready for a new relationshipyou do and who has the heart at half gas now, it’s you.
Obviously these types of people are the best thing that happens to those who are with them. They are committed, help and walk by your side. But the commitment is not reciprocal, and this type of relationship can have very negative effects on the bridge person, such as falling in love without the other person falling in love with us.
The problem is not in the bridging relationship itself, but in the lack of honesty that is often linked to these relationships. Yeah we communicate to our partner that we are not sure of the relationship, that the previous one still hurts or that we are not ready for the commitment, we can give the option to that person who is the bridge to decide or not to stay.
Photos | Seth Doyle, Everton Villa, Nathan McBride and Shea Rouda in Unsplash
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