The thing about Aitana and Sebastián Yatra is a story that we have been able to see a lot in our environment and even have experienced in the first person. You and your partner leave it (Miguel Bernardeau and Aitana) and after a “short” time, there is already a new relationship in your life or in theirs (Sebastián Yatra and Aitana).
But be careful of the quotes that I have put in “little” because they are not a coincidence. Who determines how long is short? Or that’s long enough… In the case of Yatra and Aitana we do not have the exact time either (we have created a timeline of their relationship) from the breakup (it is one thing to break up and quite another for the world to find out) to the new relationship.
How long does it take to go back to dating after breaking up with our partner?
If what we are talking about is having dates, we could tell you that if you are Piqué you may even have them without breaking up with your partner (don’t do it, please, cheat on your partner it’s ugly). There are people who practically the next day or two days have a new appointment. They need to fill the time, distract themselves, meet people or even practice that one nail drives another nail (a premise that doesn’t always work, we already told you in the tips to get over a break up).
It is possible that you hook a relationship with another without a fallow period, which the psychologist Mamen Jiménez calls “serial monogamous”. People who don’t leave a pause between relationships and always have a partner. It may be that loneliness scares you, something that happens with serial monogamists who believe that romantic love is the antithesis of loneliness.
But it may also be that we need or want to be alone, more or less time, to analyze our life, reflect and think that love is better to come from freedom and desire and not to fill a void. Science does not have an exact time for us to be alone after a breakup, in the same way that it does not have an exact number of how much sex is necessary in a couple.
How long does it take to get back into a relationship after a breakup?
Iria Reguera, psychologist and editor-in-chief of Trendencias, explains that “There are no generalized rules, but rushing is not usually a good companion” and adds that “spending time alone after a breakup can not only be a good idea, but it is a form of self-care”. But as in everything related to relationships, each person is different and the time you need to get over a breakup is not the same as I need.
In fact, it is possible to end a relationship, meet someone a few weeks later, and a new relationship ends up emerging from that date. It will depend on both parties, if the break has been from respect, whether or not you consider the separation to be over… The most important thing in this case and as Iria explains, is that we ask ourselves why we want to start a new relationship. Maybe we don’t want to feel alone or we need to be with someone to be happy. Ask yourself something: are you alone and happy but that person adds more happiness to your life? The difference between needing a relationship or wanting to start a relationship is the key.
Let’s put a practical case, mine. The one who was my partner and I had been in a relationship for 14 years with a break at 4 years in which we were not together. After so long the relationship had begun to crack and despite the fact that he made the decision to end it, in my heart the breakup had occurred a long time ago. Mourning for me began long before the date we parted ways and I am happy being alone. That does not mean that if someone crosses my path and brings more happiness to the equation of my life, I will refuse. In fact, if I started with a new partner now, I wouldn’t think that my previous relationship ended “just a little while ago” because I consider my break up more than over.
If we listen to our psychologists, the most important thing is ask ourselves at what point of recovery and relationship with ourselves we are to know if we are ready to have a new relationship or not. Thinking about whether you are happy being alone, if you are comfortable with your life or if you are not hurt are some of the questions that Iria recommends that we ask ourselves to know if we are ready for a new relationship.
Whether that time is more or less short will only depend on you, the breakup and the person with whom you start this new relationship, because as we said at the beginning, each one of us is different and there is no exact figure for this.
Photos | g3online (Author: GSLV/ USG), How I Met Your Mother
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